Who Are You Lord? : I Am Grace

Psalms 139:7 KJV
Whither shall I go from thy spirit? or whither shall I flee from thy presence?

James 4:6 KJV
But he giveth more grace. Wherefore he saith, God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble.

Hebrews 4:16 KJV
Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.

Shame says that because I am flawed, I am unacceptable. Grace says that though I am flawed, I am cherished.

It is so hard to believe that I was worth being cherished looking back at those years I was living out of the will of God.  And to be honest, I wasn't.  There wasn't a bone in my body worth being cherished.  I was living in sin, never giving a thought to my Lord and Savior, except for the twinging in my heart when the Holy Ghost would whisper that I knew better than what I was doing.  But I ignored it and went right on living my life the way I wanted to.  But I couldn't hide from Him. The Psalmist asks where can I go from thy spirit? Where shall I flee from thy presence?  And the answer is nowhere. Psalm 139:8 KJV
If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there.  I had certainly made my bed in hell and He saw my every move, my every sin...But He giveth more grace.

Grace...Approval, Favor, Mercy, Pardon, Privilege, Reprieve, Unmerited Divine Assistance.  I cannot kid myself into believing that God found favor and approval in how I lived my life from 2005-2012, but because I had Christ as my Savior, my Mediator, I was covered by His grace.  I had His pardon and reprieve for my sins.  I was privileged to be shown mercy.  I was given unmerited divine assistance when I couldn't even see that I needed it.  He gave me grace in giving me blessings I didn't deserve and He gave me mercy is sparing me from the justice I did deserve. 

It would be very easy for me to look back at those 7 years we were living out of the will of God and instead of seeing mercy and grace I could blame God for all the things we did suffer.  I could blame God for our house burning down and losing everything but the clothes on our backs.  I lost my wedding dress, our wedding pictures, the antique family cradle and crib I had just moved in and set up in preparation of starting a family, we lost every memento from our lives.  I could say that the fire was punishment for our sins.  But I see mercy because we kept our lives, I see grace because He gave us the means to be able to start over and buy a home, I see mercy and grace that there was not a baby already in that cradle upstairs where the fire started...But he giveth more grace.

Truthfully I did blame God when we lost Lachlan.  I was overflowing with anger.  My soul was black with sorrow and pain.  And I lashed out at God.  I screamed at Him inside my head while my heart was breaking, while the tears flowed unceasingly from my eyes.  I absolutely couldn't understand a God who would take yet another baby from my womb. But even in my broken heart I knew it wasn't God's fault. I couldn't hate Him.  I never uttered those words, never thought them.  I wanted to say that losing my babies was the price of my sins but that isn't true.  I know now that it was mercy and grace.  Mercy in that He took my baby out of a pain filled world and took him to his heavenly home to be made perfect.  Grace in that He let me have him long enough to feel him move within me, to love him intensely.  Mercy in that I did not have to see my sweet baby boy suffer here in this world and grace that I know that I will hold him again one day in the presence of my Savior.  Mercy and grace in that I have 2 beautiful baby boys, who I don't deserve, but I love and cherish immeasurably because of the struggle to have them...But he giveth more grace.

No I cannot blame God for the things that happened when we were living out of His will. And I cannot say that our life has been perfect since we have been back in church and in service for the Lord. Brandon was without a steady job for 8 months in 2013 and we are still suffering the effects of it.  We had very little income.  We sold many of our possessions to have money for gas and groceries.  But instead of shouting at God and demanding to know why this had happened to us when we were doing our best to live according to His will and purpose we prayed.  We went boldly unto the throne of grace, so that we might obtain mercy, and find grace to help us in our time of need.  Was it easy to do? No. It was a struggle each and every day to remember to put our faith in God.  Some days we succeeded and some days we didn't.  But throughout the entire 8 months God showed us mercy and grace.  Mercy in that we didn't lose our home because as sinners we deserved nothing less.  Grace in that He provided us a family and a church that saw to our needs so that our boys never went without.  Mercy and grace in Brandon finding a job that was exactly what he had always wanted, a job that is on 1st shift that enables him to go to church any night of the week he wants to and still be an amazing father...But he giveth more grace.

I have learned so many things in these last 2 years.  I am closer now to God than I have ever been, so even though I have shame in the years I was away from Him, and I wasn't worth being cherished, He cherished me anyway. And I have learned, perhaps the hard way, that the will of God will never take you where the grace of God will not protect you.

But he giveth more grace.

Who Are You Lord?: I Am Love

Isaiah 43:1 KJV
But now thus saith the Lord that created thee, O Jacob, and he that formed thee, O Israel, Fear not: for I have redeemed thee, I have called thee by thy name; thou art mine.

1 John 4:8, 16 KJV
8 He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love.
16 And we have known and believed the love that God hath to us. God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in him.

John 17:23, 24 KJV
23 I in them, and thou in me, that they may be made perfect in one; and that the world may know that thou hast sent me, and hast loved them, as thou hast loved me.
24 Father, I will that they also, whom thou hast given me, be with me where I am; that they may behold my glory, which thou hast given me: for thou lovedst me before the foundation of the world.

I think that one of the most exciting things about finding out that you're expecting a baby is picking out a name.  I know as a little girl I had lists of baby names as long as my arm. At one time I wanted 6 kids and had a name picked out for each one, I've even used a name or 2 off those lists written so many years ago.  For as long as I can remember I've wanted to be a Momma.  Sure there was a time when I wanted to be a doctor, a veterinarian, a pediatric nurse, a teacher, a writer, but the one thing that remained was my desire to be Momma to someone.  I loved my children long before they were conceived, when they were only a dream in a young girl's heart. 

The struggle to become a Momma was not something I anticipated.  I don't think as a woman, that the thought that bearing children, doing what your body was made to do as only a woman's body can, will be a struggle.  The thought that I might not be able to never even entered my mind when we decided to have babies. We only tried for 2 months before getting those 2 pink lines I had waited years to see.  So when I miscarried just a week after learning I was pregnant, not only was I devastated, I was shocked and stunned as well.  It was a curve ball I had never expected. One thing that I've carried with me is that I never had a chance to pick a name for my baby.  We went and bought a dozen books on pregnancy, parenting and a huge baby name book the weekend we found out I was pregnant but I hadn't been able to choose a name before my dreams were extinguished and my heart broken.  I had loved my baby long before he or she existed and yet I don't even have a name to call my baby by in my heart and prayers.  But Isaiah 43:1 gives me a peace that fills my soul to overflowing.  But now thus saith the Lord that created thee, O Jacob, and he that formed thee, O Israel, Fear not: for I have redeemed thee, I have called thee by thy name; thou art mine.  My baby has a name, given to him by our very Creator and I look forward to the day when I can hold my precious baby in my arms and call him by his God given name.

That same baby name book is now scarred and dog earred from 4 more pregnancies.  4 beautiful names chosen with love. 2 of them I use daily, hourly, minutely...some days Kieran and Devlin seem to be the only words I utter, sometimes in frustration, exasperation, joyously, tenderly, but always lovingly.  The other 2 names are whispered in my heart, in those quiet moments when it's just me and my Lord, when I pray that they know how much I love them still and how my arms ache to hold them. Oh what a glorious day it will be when I can worship at the feet of my Savior with my arms full of babies. 

And yet I know how very loved the 3 of them are in Heaven.  In John 17, Jesus is praying to his Father.  He is praying that God love us as He has loved Jesus.  Verse 24 tells us that God has loved Jesus before the foundation of this world.  And so the very God that knows my name, my babies' names, has loved us as He has loved His Only Begotten Son.  And knowing that, I cannot be sorrowful that I cannot have them here with me physically. 1 John 4 tells us that God is love, and to dwell in love is to dwell in God.  So I may not be able to wrap my arms around them but I can dwell with them in God's precious, soul saving love.  I can dwell in the knowledge that He knows my baby's name and He knows mine.

He Knows My Name

He counts the stars one and all 
He knows how much sand is on the shores 
He sees every sparrow that falls 
He made the mountains and the seas 
He's in control of everything 
Of all creatures great and small 

And He knows my name 
Every step that I take 
Every move that I make 
Every tear that I cry 
He knows my name 
When I'm overwhelmed by the pain 
And can't see the light of day 
I know I'll be just fine 
'Cause He knows my name 

I don't know what tomorrow may bring 
I can't tell you what's in store 
I don't know a lot of things 
I don't have all the answers 
To the questions of life 
But I know in Whom I have believed 

He knew who I was when He carried my cross 
He knew that I would fail Him but He took the loss 

Every step that I take 
Every move that I make 
Every tear that I cry

Who Are You Lord?

Who Are You, Lord?

While Praying One Day A Woman Asked, 

"Who Are You, Lord?"

He Answered, "I Am". 

But, Who Is I Am? She Said.

And He Replied...

"I Am Love, I Am Peace,

I Am Grace, I Am Joy,

I Am The Way, Truth, And The Light ...

I Am The Comforter,

I Am Strength, I Am Safety,

I Am Shelter, I Am Power, I Am The Creator,

I Am The Beginning And The End,

I Am The Most High".

The Girl With Tears In Her Eyes Looked

Toward Heaven And Said,

"Now I Understand. 

But Lord, Who Am I?"

Then God Tenderly Wiped The Tears

From Her Eyes And Whispered,

"You Are Mine".

He Knows My Name

Isaiah 43:1 KJV

But now thus saith the Lord that created thee, O Jacob, and he that formed thee, O Israel, Fear not: for I have redeemed thee, I have called thee by thy name; thou art mine.

He Sees My Every Move

Psalms 139:7 KJV

Whither shall I go from thy spirit? or whither shall I flee from thy presence?

He Thinks About Me

Psalms 139:17 KJV

How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! how great is the sum of them!

He Is With Me

Joshua 1:9 KJV

Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.

He Will Fight For Me

Exodus 14:14 KJV

The Lord shall fight for you, and ye shall hold your peace.

He Made Me In His Image

Genesis 1:27 KJV

So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.

He Is My Safe Place

Psalms 62:6-8 KJV

6 He only is my rock and my salvation: he is my defence; I shall not be moved.
7 In God is my salvation and my glory: the rock of my strength, and my refuge, is in God.
8 Trust in him at all times; ye people, pour out your heart before him: God is a refuge for us. Selah.

He Has A Plan For Me

Jeremiah 29:11 KJV

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.

He Is Good

Psalms 119:68 KJV

Thou art good, and doest good; teach me thy statutes.

He Is Freedom

2 Corinthians 3:17 KJV

Now the Lord is that Spirit: and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty.

He Is Always With Me

Matthew 28:20 KJV

Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen.

The Lifter Up of Mine Head

Psalms 3:3 KJV
But thou, O Lord, art a shield for me; my glory, and the lifter up of mine head.

The Bible is a treasure trove. When I get in His Word, I never regret it. I learn something new every time I read my Bible.  Even if I have read the same passage 100 times, something new will speak to my heart.  His Holy Word is a living and breathing part of Him and if I want to get closer to Him I have to make the time every day to spend reading His Love Letter to me.  

I found this verse in January when I was desperately seeking solace in the immediate aftermath of our miscarriage.  It has become "my verse" and the verse for Help The Hurt Ministry.  I did something after this most recent miscarriage that I didn't do after the first one or when we lost Lachlan, I turned to Christ for my comfort.  I prayed and I cried out for comfort and understanding, I used Christian music to help soothe my soul, to just listen to and cry as the songs expressed my emotions, and I read my Bible.  

This verse tells me that Christ is a shield for me.  He is my shield, my protector.  I think about my boys and what I would do for them if they were in any kind of danger, or were hurting or crying out for help.  I would wrap my arms around them, pull them in tight against my chest and put my head on theirs, covering them with my body.  Shielding them, protecting them, with all the strength and power I had in me.  Now to think that in my pain of losing yet another precious baby, that is exactly what my Lord was doing for me.  He wrapped me in His arms, pulled me in tight against His chest and laid His head upon mine.  Loving me, protecting me, comforting me.

Psalms 3:3 tells me that Christ is my glory.  I am still experiencing the fallout from the miscarriage.  Various health issues that have sent me to the doctor as well as the mental impact it has had.  After struggling for 18 months to conceive again after our first miscarriage, there is always the fear that we will struggle again to have a baby.  There is the guilt and doubt, the worry and the shame, the feelings of inferiority and failure. Was it something I did, could I have prevented it, will it happen again, will I ever feel life growing in my womb again, I cannot even do the very thing that my body was designed to do, I am a failure at being a woman...But God...God tells me that He is my Glory.  He is all I need.  He is my magnificence, my splendor, my beauty, and my honor. If I fail at everything else in this life I will know I have done one thing right, I have accepted Him as my Savior and in doing that He has become my Glory.

He is the lifter up of mine head.  Too often in these days of grief, in these days of doubt, in these days of learning how to be a Christ like Momma, I find my head hung low, my attitude lower, and myself in tears. My boys hang their heads in shame and guilt when they've done something wrong, they lower their heads with tears streaming down their faces when they're hurt, they tuck their chins to their chests when they're being shy or unsure of something. They mirror exactly what they see me do. But what does He do? He lifts up our heads, He wipes away the tears, He loves and comforts us as no one else can or ever will. He gives us the strength and reassurance that we need to live another day in service for Him, to bring glory and honor to His name because that is our purpose here. My purpose in this life is to not only raise my boys but to raise them to know Christ as their Savior, no other job is more important than pointing another soul to Christ, especially those of our children. If we don't show them who Christ is, the world will show them everything He isn't. And to do this I must keep my head held high and my focus on Him, for He is my Shield, my Glory, and the Lifter Up of Mine Head.

Romans Road

The greatest road anyone will ever travel: Romans Road to Salvation

Romans 3:23 KJV

23 For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;

Romans 5:8 KJV

8 But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

Romans 6:23 KJV

23 For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.

Romans 8:1 KJV

8 There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.

Romans 8:38-39 KJV

38 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,

39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 10:9 KJV

9 That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved.

Romans 10:13 KJV

13 For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.

24 Weeks

Psalm 127:3 KJV
Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.

Isaiah 44:24 KJV
Thus saith the Lord, thy redeemer, and he that formed thee from the womb, I am the Lord that maketh all things; that stretcheth forth the heavens alone; that spreadeth abroad the earth by myself;

Jeremiah 1:5 KJV
Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations.

Luke 1:15 KJV
For he shall be great in the sight of the Lord, and shall drink neither wine nor strong drink; and he shall be filled with the Holy Ghost, even from his mother's womb.

Luke 1:41 KJV
And it came to pass, that, when Elisabeth heard the salutation of Mary, the babe leaped in her womb; and Elisabeth was filled with the Holy Ghost:


My children are the most important things in my life, next to Jesus.  I count myself blessed beyond measure to be their Momma, to be able to see them grow and learn new things, to see them sweetly sing Jesus Loves Me and watch them as they begin to understand His love.  Teaching them about Christ's Love and His Sacrifice is my most important job in this life.  I treasure every day that I am given with them.  After struggling for so long, after losing Lachlan, to imagine my life without them would be a nightmare.  

From the time I was a little girl I knew I wanted to be a Momma.  From the time I was a freshman in high school I had a firm stance as a Pro-Lifer, in any and all circumstances. Abortion is an extremely hot topic.  A topic that to me is simply black and white but to many is filled with shades of grey.  This week a video exploded onto social media networks.  It was a video filmed by a young woman of her own, self-proclaimed, positive abortion story.  Emily Letts is a patient advocate at the Cherry Hill Women's Center in Cherry Hill, New Jersey. She speaks with women before their abortion procedures. Throughout her 3 minute video she proclaims that she is a lucky girl, that the abortion doctors are her heroes, that she feels good. At the end of the video she says, "I don't feel sad. I feel in awe that I can make a life. I can make a baby".  She does not say how many weeks pregnant she is, but if she had the abortion performed at the Cherry Hill Women's Center, she could have been up to 24 weeks and 6 days pregnant and they would still have performed the abortion to "remove the pregnancy", as stated on their website.  At 24 weeks the baby's brain cells are matured enough to develop conscious thought and memory, the baby can hear and recognize sounds and songs, the baby can respond to light, touch and movement, the baby can reach and grasp, the baby can dream, feel pain, and suck his thumb. The baby has a fighting chance and can, with medical intervention, survive if born prematurely at 24 weeks.

Abortion is a subject always talked about and yet never talked about. And I'm betting, prayed about even less. It makes me sick to my stomach, my heart aches, there is a lump lodged in my throat even now as I write this.  I read several articles regarding Emily Letts this week and found that I have been far too quick to condemn the women who have abortions as souless murderers in the past.  I've wanted to scream at them, call them vile names, damn them to hell.  But this week I came across an article written by a former Planned Parenthood Clinic Director, who had herself had 2 abortions, and the Holy Ghost tugged at my heart and whispered in my ear. He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her (John 8:7 KJV).  In that moment I wanted to weep for those women, for the pain I know that many of them come to feel after their abortions, for the loss, the guilt, the regret.  I wanted to weep for the doctors, the clinic workers, the men and women all over the world who support abortion.  It is them we should be weeping for.  Those precious babies whose lives were ended before they even began, those innocent souls are with my Lord and Savior.  They are safe, secure, and loved as they could never be here on this earth.  But these men and women in the midst of pro-choice culture, they need our prayers, they need our witness, they need our Savior.

The fruit of our wombs are His reward.  Our children are His heritage.  He formed us in our mother's womb.  He knows us and our calling before we are even formed.

In Luke chapter 1 we find Elisabeth who was barren and stricken in years.  She and her husband Zacharias were both righteous before God.  An angel of the Lord, Gabriel, appeared to Zacharias and told him that Elisabeth would conceive a son and his name was to be John, that he would be great in the sight of the Lord and filled with the Holy Ghost even from his mother's womb.  Elisabeth conceived and hid herself 5 months.

We also find in Luke chapter 1 that Gabriel visits the virgin Mary to tell her of her coming conception: The Holy Ghost shall come upon thee, and the power of the Highest shall overshadow thee: therefore also that holy thing which shall be born of thee shall be called the Son of God. And, behold, thy cousin Elisabeth, she hath also conceived a son in her old age: and this is the sixth month with her, who was called barren.  (Luke 1:35, 36 KJV).  

Luke 1:39-44 KJV
39 And Mary arose in those days, and went into the hill country with haste, into a city of Juda;
40 And entered into the house of Zacharias, and saluted Elisabeth.
41 And it came to pass, that, when Elisabeth heard the salutation of Mary, the babe leaped in her womb; and Elisabeth was filled with the Holy Ghost:
42 And she spake out with a loud voice, and said, Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb.
43 And whence is this to me, that the mother of my Lord should come to me?
44 For, lo, as soon as the voice of thy salutation sounded in mine ears, the babe leaped in my womb for joy.

Elisabeth was 6 months pregnant when Mary went to visit her.  Elisabeth was 24 weeks pregnant when Mary went to visit her.  Elisabeth was 24 weeks pregnant when John leaped in her belly at the presence of His Lord in Mary's womb.  Elisabeth was 24 weeks pregnant with John when the Holy Ghost filled her and her heart immediately knew Mary carried her Lord and Savior in her womb.  24 weeks pregnant.  Still within the legal limit for an abortion in many of the states in the U. S. today.

We must speak out against abortion, we must pray for it's end, and we must also treat those women around us who have had an abortion or support it, with love.  We must end the hatred and disdain.  Is abortion murder of an innocent? Yes.  Is one sin greater than another? No.  Does the sin of abortion carry far greater repercussions than we could ever imagine? Yes.  Please join me in prayer this Mother's Day weekend for those women suffering the pain of having had an abortion and those, like Emily Letts who have not yet begun to feel the guilt and regret of their choices.  Join me in praying for the doctors, clinic workers, and pro-choice supporters, that God may change their hearts, that they might come to know Christ as their Savior.  Please help me to pray each and every day for an end to abortion.

A Virtuous Woman

Proverbs 31:10, 17, 25, 26, 28, 30 KJV

10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

17 She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.

25 Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.

26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.

Rubies can command the highest price of any of the gemstones.  The price is determined by their quality which is determined by color, size and weight, clarity and cut.  Fine quality rubies over one carat are very rare and valuable.  Proverbs 31 tells us that a virtuous woman is valuable beyond the price of rubies.  Proverbs 12 also tells us that a virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones.  If there is one thing I want to strive to be in this life, it is a virtuous woman.  A woman of high moral standards and yet according to Proverbs 31, so much more than that.

I have many important, influential women in my life.  Women that I love and cherish and look to for strength and guidance. But when I think of a virtuous woman, one stands out among the others.  My Granmaw Deyton. Her favorite color is even red.

She girdeth her loins, she surrounded herself, with strength and strengtheneth her arms. Raising 4 boys is not an easy task.  Raising 4 boys with just 2 years between each one is an even harder task.  Raising 4 boys with Deyton tempers and stubborness is well, nearly impossible.  But my Granmaw gathered the Lord's strength around her and did just that. And from the stories I've heard my Daddy tell it took every ounce of strength the Lord would give her.   

She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness. Granmaw is quiet and soft spoken.  She doesn't sit and idly gossip.  She is full of wisdom and kindness.  I always loved to sit and listen to her stories as a little girl.  And as a Momma I can appreciate and marvel that Granmaw never had to be hateful and raise her voice.  Granmaw could accomplish in a single look what screaming from the rooftops wouldn't be able to do for me, or at least that's what it feels like at times.  With a single look she could strike fear in those 4 rough and tumble boys.  They sat up straight in the church pews, they didn't fidget, look behind them, talk or laugh.  They most definitely didn't take the Lord's name in vain, which I may or may not know from my own childhood experience.  You'd have thought they were perfect angels.  Because one look from Granmaw meant business.  She didn't believe in sparing the rod to spoil the child and those boys knew it.  

Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.  I look at my 2 boys and see their streaks of Deyton tempers and stubborness, and I hope and pray to have the relationship with them that my Granmaw does with my Daddy and my Uncles.  She taught them to work hard, to be respectful, to love the Lord, and how to be fathers.  My Daddy certainly inherited "the look".  (I really need to practice "the look" in the mirror. I am obviously doing it wrong.)  She turned 4 rowdy, wild boys, into 4 pretty amazing men.  And the love that they have for her is abundant.  My Granpaw passed away in 2011 and he was a wonderful man.  He loved my Granmaw and it showed. And she loved and respected him.  His meals were hot, on time and just the way he liked them, right down to his plate, fork, and coffee mug.  His clothes were clean, pressed and put away.  The house was immaculate.  And it was all done because she loved my Granpaw from the depths of her heart.  They spent the evenings together after a hard day's work in quiet companionship.  

Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.  My Granmaw loves the Lord.  Going to church with her is one of my favorite memories.  I can remember how proud of me she was when I would recite my Bible verse. I remember standing between her and Granpaw to sing hymns, listening to good old fashioned preaching and fellowshipping after service.  And I can remember her Bible, worn with love and years of reading and getting close to the Lord.  

Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.  Caring for my Granpaw while he was sick was unfortunately familiar territory for Granmaw.  She cared for both of her parents in their last years as sickness overcame them.  She never hesitated to move them into her home and nurse them day in and day out.  She certainly did no less for her husband.  She never left my Granpaw's side.  The amount strength and honor that it takes to tenderly and lovingly tend to a dying loved one, not once, not twice but three times is staggering.  

My Granmaw's life is a testament of the Lord's strength and love.  And she will leave it behind in the hearts of her boys and her grandchildren.  I pray that I have many more years to continue to love her and learn from her but I know that she is rejoicing at the time to come.  The time when she will meet with her Lord and Savior and worship at His feet as she has done faithfully here on earth.  I fervently pray to be more like her every day.  To serve my Lord and my family out of love, not just duty.